Thursday, October 13, 2005

Mostly Wrong Is Right for Me

People said, “You think you’re always right.”
They were wrong.

I think about right and wrong.
I never think about being right or wrong.

Beyond the black and white of school books and the dialogue of dance, I know I am mostly wrong, if anything.

When people said that, I was even more wrong. The world of social interactions was beyond a blind to me. My clothes were wrong. My hair was wrong. My questions were out of space. My favorite things were nowhere. I thought too much. I was much too perceptive to see. Social miscues were my modus operandi.

People offered unending mysteries in their logic and expectations. The greatest of these was that I was supposed to fit in, but no one said how. It took me years to realize that it had to do with thinking. The clothes, the hair, the miscues, they were billboards that advertised, “I don’t think like you. I’m from another planet.”

I’m here to say I didn’t know. When I stood on the table in Kindergarten and sang “The Good Ship Lollipop” as Elvis Presley would, I didn’t know that I was supposed to like Pat Boone like everybody else did.

What possible use could my thinking be if it is one more echo? Does the world need thought redundancy to keep us safe and keep it turning?

That was a rebel thought again. At least now I recognize it. I also know that some folks believe I can change the fact that I think it, that they call me arrogant for not doing so. They’ll never know how good I am at jumping hoops to avoid such social faux pas. They have no clue the headaches I’ve known in trying to ignore or change my thinking.

Finally I’ve reached an age where most people think it’s eccentricity.

Ocasionally I still run into one who believes I think I’m always right. If I have the energy and there’s a chance I will be heard, this is what I say,

“No, I’m good at being wrong. I’ve been mostly wrong all of my life. I don’t know what’s right for you, nor should you do what I would do. What you mistake as me thinking that I’m right is that I know what’s right for me.”

Mostly wrong is right for me.

My son’s never heard of Pat Boone and Elvis is still King.

—me strauss Letting me be


Jennifer said...

Good Morning.

Thanks for the viewpoint. I like it. You're bringing back school memories I thought I'd forgotten :)

Why do we have to follow the trends of society? Why can't each person be who they are without fear of being outcast, called different, or otherwise singled out? Guess it'll always be like's just how our society works.

Okay to work for me!

ME Strauss said...

Hi Jennifer,
You have memories of dancing and singing like Elvis too?? :)

I'm not sure what brought on this little rant, perhaps it was all that talk of people not liking their names.

Thanks for stopping by.
I'll tell everyone to visit your site "Artists and Writers" to vote for your dog.

Jennifer said...

:) Thanks

Well my dancing and singing (though I wouldn't call it singing...more like butchering since I'm totally tone-deaf) was to Debbie Gibson...but otherwise it was pretty close :)

ME Strauss said...

Maybe one day we should get together and not sing. :)

Cheryl said...

'You think you're always right' is a statement of jealousy. What they mean, but can't say, is 'why are you not always thinking that you are wrong?'

They MEAN that they have succumbed to such a need to fit in that they describe themselves according to the flighty voice of the masses, that they are prisoners and you are not, and they resent your freedom.

I bet if you found those people (teenagers?) you would find they all still have a quiet, residual envy of you, even a wish that they could have been you.

Heaven forbid that they should have admitted that at the time, they had already bought the concept that to express weakness or difference was to volunteer for annihilation by the pack. You had a strength, but they had a weakness, and they knew it, and actively denied it on a daily basis by making sure they were laughing loud enough at someone else, to reduce the (to them terrifying) possibility that they were being laughed at, themselves.

And bloody hell, where did that come from. Better go back in my little box and have a hunt for the tablets.............

Jennifer said...

Sounds good (especially the not singing part :)

ME Strauss said...

Stop, no need for the little tablets yet! What you're saying makes total sense. Not that I was necessarily right, but that their motivative came from weakness not from strength. That's the kind of insight this discussion needs.


zilla said...

Woo! Cheryl is on again!

Loved the post, Liz. And the comments are interesting, too.

easywriter said...

I still don't fit in either and ummm...I don't care for Elvis or Pat Boone. LOL

garnet david said...

This is intense. I felt like I was writing it, except that I haven't learned that what's wrong is right for me yet, because I'm still not sure. At least you know.

Identity (I'm also thinking of your name post) is so mysterious. We all want to fit in. As you wrote, some houses are not big enough. Mine just doesn't have enough rooms.

I was in a foulblogger mood, until I read this. Now I'm boyant again.


ME Strauss said...

Hi 'Zilla
Thanks for the support.
Elvis is glad you came.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Easy,
You know Pat and Elvis always speak highly of you . . . :)

ME Strauss said...

I'm starting to think that you and I are cut from the same fabric. I'm delighted to hear you are bouyant again.

I've been in an airplane all day so I'm barely grounded.

Bluesky_Liz said...

>> The greatest of these was that I was supposed to fit in, but no one said how

On the contrary, in my experience with people they had a lot of advice on how. But trying to do so made me miserable for a few years and finally I gave up trying to fit in. Besides trying to fit in made me not me and made things even worse.

Maybe it was just the kind of crowd I shouldn't have gotten mixed up with.

>> What possible use could my thinking be if it is one more echo? Does the world need thought redundancy to keep us safe and keep it turning?

Some people or maybe a lot of people i know can't stand to be alone. They reflect that kind of thought in their actions. If you are not for me , you are against me. It certainly doesn't keep our world turning, but it keeps their world turning...

/rant off

Gone Away said...

As a chameleon, I must point out the benefits of camouflage. The trick is to appear like all the rest but to remain true to yourself inside.

Of course, as one gets older, it matters less and less - one is almost expected to be eccentric after a certain age. ;)


ME Strauss said...

As usual, that was not a rant, that was deep insightful thinking. You're right, there was plenty of advice on how to fit in. It just didn't fit me or you.

And you're right too. It keeps THEIR world turning. I hadn't got there yet. Thank you.


ME Strauss said...

Hi Gone,
Yes, dear chameleon, gosh I wish I had had that wisdom and insight. Yours is part instinct and part talent I think.

I was merely a grasshoppper.


Mark said...

Stick with me here..

since mostly wrong is right for you and you know you're mostly wrong then in reality you are always right.

One of those things that make you go, "Hmmm..."

ME Strauss said...

Well, Mark,
I find Hmmmm to be a very nice sound.