Saturday, June 16, 2007

In the Morning Almost There

I remember the days when we would camp outside. I'm not much of a camper. No, no, not a sleep-on-the-grouder, not ever. How I happened to be there, even my childhood years, I won't ever know. Room service doesn't go there. Bears and other things that aren't people tend take my attention from noises unseen in the darkness. It's not my shade of green, or gray, or black. No, no, not my color -- not my feeling. -- not even close.

Though I spread out my spirit under the wide, wide, so open sky, though I feel my thoughts calm and grow loarger as each moment brings me closer to the dirt, I can't help but wish for a real roof to keep the rain at bay. I imagine some screens to keep mosquitoes looking in other directions, because I am out of reach. They would be there. I would be here.

I don't sleep.

Rocks in the ground sit in my back. Night and it's sounds play in my head. They are calling my sense of imagery. No, no, not thoughts of wonderment. It's too stark there. It's too overwhelmingly uncivilized. I prefer wonder, but there's no wonder there in the dark.

Spooky, creepy ideas take me to a Stephen King book that he never wrote. I refuse to be inside a grown-up, little boy's nightmare book. I can devise and live in my own.

I write in my journal by the camplight. It's the Abe Lincoln me.

The quiet of the night before dawn there, drowns me with relief. I am settled and softened. I was made to be part of the changing light, part of the changes happening to the night. No, no, not a change in me. A change out there.

In the morning, almost there in my mind, I am where the sky shines like heaven visits it's gentle glow on me. Right here, right now.

In the morning, almost there, I wish everyone I love were with me. to feel what I feel.

--me strauss Letting me be


Dawn said...

I love the title of this post, Liz. I know exactly the lure of it. I know what it means when you say I was made to be part of the changing light. I, too, was made for that. Each morning almost there I sit quietly and bring all the people I love and care about into that pre-dawn moment with me. I am richer for the experience, and say a silent prayer that they are as well.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Dawn,
The title makes me hold my breath in silence because I want to hear the light changing. I want to feel the presence of the air with the light upon it.

I know what you are saying. :)

Anonymous said...

~beautiful, Liz
I recognize this ~hearing light and seeing silence as it only happens when we are inside nature and not outside of it..

ME Strauss said...

Hi Both Eyes,
You know. Thank you for saying so. :)

Garnet said...

Hi Liz- This sounds like adult Dr. Seuss in its rhythm. As usual, your inimitable style touches my heart.

I hope you are well, Liz.


ME Strauss said...

Hello Garnet,
I'm so touched to see you. Thank you for being here. I'm so busy and you are so close in my thoughts.


Margaret said...

I will surely remember this blog post when I wake up early tomorrow morning to take my husband to the airport by 4:40am. Great writing and imagery.


(A nice blogger by the name of Dr. John suggested we come over here and enjoy your wonderful writing.)

dsnake1 said...

this is lovely, Liz, the quiet beauty of this work.
and really like the title, grabs your attention right from the start.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Margaret,
I went to see Dr. John's blog and everyone there seems as nice as he.

Thank you for coming to visit and to introduce yourself! It's so nice to meet you!

ME Strauss said...

Hi Dsnake!
I like the title too! It sits well in my heart and so describes the feeling. Youf words mean so much. I know you understand the delicate ways that words work. :)

Jen / domestika said...

That's really beautiful, Liz. I think that I might choose to take it as a metaphor, because it feels like a lot of quiet wisdom floating there.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Jen,
Thank you. It's what I think of as a Zen vacation in my head. I guess that could make it a metaphor of sorts. :)

Dr.John said...

I never liked camping either . I was always happy to see the dawn when all the dark things vanished.

Janus Torrell said...

I only camp when I have to, I much prefer camp Holiday Inn.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Dr. John,
How nice to meet you. I like the almost morning. I'll meet you there. :)

ME Strauss said...

Hi Janus!
Holiday Inn and room service is my way too. :)