Tuesday, May 09, 2006

A Little Bit About Feelings

Hey you. I'm sure don't know everything, but I know a little bit about feelings. I've felt so many in my time. I know how it feels to hold the world perfect, joyful for whole minutes in my hands and to watch slowly slide down through my fingers into darkness like so many grains of sands falling to the ocean floor. I know the feel of the sky against my face on the warmest summer night with the sweetest thoughts of life ahead, dreams and promises, words unsaid.

I've been so happy that I've cried and so torn with fear of someone's dying that all that we could do was laugh. I've walked into the darkest tunnel and turned around to walk right back.

I know a little bit about feelings. I've even carried mine beside me rather than feel them, rather than admit that they exist. It didn't work.

I don't know everything, but I know a little bit about feelings. I know that I don't have to have gone where you have been to know exactly how you feel.

I can hear what you're not saying. I know how you feel. My heart sends love to your heart. My thoughts tell your thoughts to rest.

My hope is yours keep forever. I've got plenty to last.
—me strauss Letting me be

8 comments:

Travis Jay Morgan said...

All I know is this very moment. My feelings are like a sine wave going up and down, yet spiraling around in 3D, and sometimes evening out. Everyones sine wave is slightly different. But all I know is this very moment.

ME Strauss said...

Ah, the moment . . . sometimes the moment can seem so long and then pfft sometimes it just gone. How does that happen? Time is elastic.

Shay said...

important message here.
you can't help but feel your feelings.

ME Strauss said...

Yeah, that's all feelings are good for. Isn't it? :)

Roberta said...

I have feelings I refuse to admit I have but that doesn't rid me of them. So I do a game of pretend. Since I have to carry them with me whether I want to or not, I pretend I put them in my purse and then I'm really, really careful not to carry it upside-down. Not to spill it. Not to open it. That's how I find relief from feelings I don't want to acknowledge. Seems like such utter nonsense, but it works for me.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Miss Roberta,
I understand. I used to carry mine in the air right next to me. I'm not sure how I did that. It was convenient to have them near to check on.

I found when I put my feelings back inside me. People trusted me more. They didn't flinch when I walked by them. They didn't misinterpret what I said. I quit trying to protect myself. That's just how it worked for me.

Ruth & T.C. said...

It's funny you should say this "I've been so happy that I've cried and so torn with fear of someone's dying that all that we could do was laugh."

When I got news my grandmother died...I laughed!!! When a car hit me, spun me around in the rain...I laughed :)... I thought only I had this reaction.

What can make me cry? A hauntigly beautiful oboe solo. That has to be one of the most lonely and yet beautiful sounds on earth,

Ruth, thanks for sharing

ME Strauss said...

It is a most stunning and freeing feeling. Isn't it. To be so deeply sad that you laugh.