Wednesday, September 21, 2005


I’ve been thinking about this for years,
and I find these two statements to be true.

I can like someone I do not respect.

I cannot respect someone I do not like.

Many people find the opposite to be true.

—me strauss Letting me be


Bluesky_Liz said...

1) If I like someone, it's usually because I respect them for some aspect about them.

The opposite is: I can't like someone I do not respect.

I can but it is more difficult. Most people I like, I respect.

2) I may show respect for someone I do not like, but do I really respect them? Probably not.

Opposite: I can respect someone I do not like?

People generally do not like Hitler, can they possibly respect him??

Ned said...

I guess it depends on what it is you respect or don't respect. For me it is basically a matter of character, priorities, principles and the willingness to stand for what is right rather than acquiesce to what they know to be wrong in order to maintain social, political or career standing.

If I don't respect them for those things, then I can't like them.

But, if they have these qualities then it doesn't matter what else they have or don't have, I will like them very well.

I am not sure I have ever met someone with strength of character whom I disliked, but I am sure I will think of one someday.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Liz,
For the most part it works the same for me . . . but

If I like someone I generally respect him or her, but I've found some funny, happy people whose company I enjoy that I cannot respect. I think that means I like them. It doesn't happen often, but it has happened.

There is no give the other way. If there is no respect, I cannot like a person--end of story.


ME Strauss said...

Hi Ned,

Strength of character--exactly. If that's missing what's left to respect? I wonder sometimes how some people look in the mirror.


Jennifer said...

The first statement "I can like someone I do not respect" I can agree with. There are people I meet who are 'fun' to be with but some decisions they make I can't respect. Of course they are usually not close friends...more like just acquaintances.

I think the second statement also holds some truth. For example we've had presidents that people haven't liked but have respected. There are people of authority that we don't like, but they do earn our respect for the job they do or such.

Just my take.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Jennifer,

Thanks for adding to the discussion.

The first one we do agree on. The second I think if you look again you'll see that we only might agree. I cannot respect soneone I do not like. I can respect the work, but not the person.


Mark Cross said...

I’m 50/50 on this one. I disagree with the first statement and agree with the second.

Respect is huge with me.

ME Strauss said...

HI Mark,
Actually, I'm surprised that more people aren't disagreeing more vehemently. When I lived in rural Massachusetts, this one really caused a fury.

I can fully understand why you wouldn't agree with the first statement. I think I have a thing for getting along that leads me to find something I like in everyone I meet if I possibly can.

But I hold the line with you on the second one.


Helen said...

Really interesting perspective. I'm going to have to chew on this for a bit. Thanks for the brain food!

ME Strauss said...

Welcome. What a great description. Brain food. That is what it's there for--to attract the hungry minds. Come back when you have chewed a bit and let me know what your thoughts are. I'm interested.


garnet said...

Three cents from me garnet.
1. I like, respect someone who tries.

2. I respect someone who likes and respects themselves.

3. I like, lick people who respect me unquestioningly. It's so good for the ego. But I don't respect them.

Late night transition...

ME Strauss said...

Hey Garnet
Some great self-observation there. the fact that the ego plays a part is a good point that no one, including me, has thought to mention. There are so many aspects to respect.

So much to think about from two little statments.


zilla said...

Are these statements implying cause and effect?

I can like someone I respect. I can respect someone I like. I can dislike someone I respect, but I cannot fail to respect someone based on my like or dislike for them.

(Because my daddy said so, that's why.)

ME Strauss said...

Ah Zilla,
No there is not cause and effect, though some polarity.

What you speak of is showing respect for humanity and I agree with your wise daddy. We owe all humans respect. I think that just as soldiers salute the rank and not the person. . . . you can show respect to a human being and not respect that person.