Some would say it was a dream. It wasn't. I was sitting by the ocean in the dark of night. I had given up hope of being the person I was supposed to be.
Everything that I was. Everything that I believed in had been challenged, worse than challenged.
Life does that sometimes, but I had run out of the love and the energy to hold my cells in repair. I didn't have juice to make joy. I couldn't make the sun rise anymore so I sat in dark watching the moon that my dad hung for me.
The moon, the moon on the water. It danced on the waves with a rhythm that rocked like chair. The moon it was like my father glowing with love and always waiting and watching over me. Just when I thought I was lost. Just when I thought I'd give up a whisper color a faint orange began to appear. Then slid like liquid across the sky.
Just when I thought I was forgotten. Just when I thought I was invisible and drowning a most marvelous light exploded in ways I could not refuse to see. The lines were brilliant and so vibrant. The colors pulled my eyes in ways daylight couldn't compete.
And as if my own father had been in charge of the light show, the moon gently laid itself on the water and began floating to me.
Then I knew. I knew then I was who I was.
Angels were everywhere once again.
I saw the moon and heaven that night.
The moon and heaven knew about me.
--me strauss Letting me be