Tuesday, October 31, 2006

The Castle Door

When I was a child, even today, I could wish for a castle door. Open it and on the other side would be a whole new life. Castle doors paved the way to places where everything changed. I could make the world rearrange easily walking through such a door. The problem was that always the person who walked through was always me.

I might try to change who I was much like a child in dress up clothes. Maybe a new dress would make so one would know that I was self-conscious, too smart, too tall, too talkative, not pretty enough. If they did, I’d be a princess and they would forgive me.

Forgive me what?

Forgive me for caring? Forgiving me for feeling small? Forgive me because I wanted to maket things right when they went horribly wrong? Forgive me for wishing I was more than I am?

Forgive me for being human?

I would be a princess inside that castle door, but a princess is human too. That was the problem with castles. The life was new, but reality proved that humanity is anything but new and different.

I learned to love my humanity, looking at the sky with my feet on the ground and my heart open wide. The stars and the angels don’t worry. They don't notice whether I care too much, worry about fixing things, try to be more. They just shine on me. Smile at me. Fill me with love.

I think I’ll leave the castle door to stay out with the stars.
−me strauss Letting me be

8 comments:

Dawn said...

When I was a child, even today, I walk through images that take me places in my imagination. Sometimes it feels like exploring. Other times, it's just out and out make-believe. Other times, I do it because I think I can hide there for awhile, try on something new. I always know I have to return.

What you've learned about forgiveness and the human condition is a powerful lesson indeed. Thanks Liz.

ME Strauss said...

Hi Dawn,
Images and metaphors help me understand things that are too close to me or too feeling-filled for me to see clearly.

Thank you,Dawn, for greeting me like a person every morning. I hold your thoughts in my mind all day long.

Steve Sherlock said...

Hello, the Hitchhiker Team came by today to write about your blog. Keep up the good work.

You can read about what we said here:
http://hgttb.blogspot.com/2006/10/letting-me-be-random-wondering-and.html

Happy Halloween!

ME Strauss said...

Hi Steve!
Thank you! i had just found your blog only ten days ago.

Tell No One said...

A sense of personal acceptance I hope one day to truly embrace :)

ME Strauss said...

Hi tell no one,
Give yourself permission and you can. :)

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