Everyday I hear people argue for what they can’t do.
“I’m not creative. I can’t draw. I’m no good at writing. I’m awful at that.”
I do it too. “I swim like a rock,” I say.
I wonder how I’ll ever do something I’m so convinced I cannot do?
Admitting that I don’t know how . . .
Saying that that I’m not good at something . . .
They are not arguing for my limits.
Why would I argue that I can’t do anything?
—me strauss Letting me be
26 comments:
I just can't understand it.
I'm stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
Stupid!
LMAO!
Let me calm down before I seriously respond to your post.
snicker...
snort...
Pft! Hahahahaha!
Okay. I think I'm fine now.
Great post, Liz! Nobody looks at life quite the way you do. Perhaps that's why reading your posts is so addictive. You're work makes takes my brain off autopilot and sometimes it's nice to be in the driver's seat.
Thanks for the thought.
One very good reason is to keep expectations low, thereby making it much easier to meet or exceed them.
Works for me. A life of disappointing people and being disappointed is very tiresome.
The more someone brags to me about how well they do something, the more likely I am to critically examine their efforts. I have never liked a braggart.
I think it is called "humility". Of course, it is okay to admit to yourself that you are great, just let other people figure it out for themselves. They will if you let them.
Hi Bobby,
Welcome to Letting me be.
Your message made me laugh.
smiles,
liz
Hi Tanda,
Thanks I think.
Liz
Hi Ned,
I'm not really talking about humility. I'm talking about people who argue for their limitations.
I don't like braggarts as much as you. But sometime people say they can't just because they believe it.
Liz
I wonder how I’ll ever do something I’m so convinced I cannot do?
It's quite simple you won't.
This could be one of the problems with being too smart, you think through too many things and are able to convice yourself of all the reasons you can do something, whereas as somebody who perhaps doesn't think as much, just does it.
Hi Lee,
What an interesting point. You could be right. It could be a problem of thinking too much.
But lots of people do it. We think our way out of trying things by thinking we can't do them.
Thanks for helping to explain what the problem is.
smiles,
Liz
As a professional graphic artist, I can not count the times I have heard "That's amazing, I can't even draw a straight line!"
To which I reply "No one can, that's why I use a ruler."
Hi Kelley,
Thank you for hearing what I was saying. I've just not been communicating clearly today. So I especially appreciate it.
Why are we comfortable at proclaiming our losses and not proclaiming our wins?
Liz,
Another wonderful post.
Thanks, Tree,
I'm starting to feel grateful for anyone who "gets" it.
smiles,
Liz
Liz, I got this 24 years ago. You're singing to the choir here. :-)
Thanks Tree,
You should see me smiling at your comment.
BIG CHESHIRE CAT GRIN
smiles,
Liz
I can I can I can :)
It's funny cause I'll say I can't then I go try it (and when I really try...well isn't it amazing what I accomplished :)).
I find many times I utter 'I can't' before I even know it.
It's so ingrained in us to say 'we can't' to something new, unfamilar, something we're not totally comfortable with...
This post makes me think of the song from American Tail - Never Say Never.
I do find that people who keep talking about what they can't do to be very tiresome. (I assume you are refering to taking up skill, experiencing new things and not talking about illegal things like trying out drugs or bad habits like smoking nor are we talking about having some individual's unique talents.) I used to be like that -- and it's easy to be like that and just continue to spiral downwards from there until all self confidence is used up.
I can't stand people who say they can't without even trying. I guess in this case because it reflects what I dislike about myself. Hearing a bunch of "I can'ts" also starts my internal whiner going.
Jennifer,
No wonder you're skating, swimming, and kayaking. You've taking the "I can" idea to an artform.:)
Sounds like you had fun today.
smiles,
Liz
Liz,
Don't doubt yourself you read me right. Besides the words mean what the reader gets from them not what the writer wants them to mean.
I agree. It's very easy for too many "I can'ts" to bring out the whiner in anyone.
smiles,
Liz
I believe it's all a head game when it comes what we can or can't do. I once was a very fearful corporate girl who thinks all she could do is to follow other big guys' orders. I thought I was born and raised in the city so I had no ability to survive in the wild and hug the tress on the high rocks.
After I turned 30, I realized that I will have to trust my heart and give everything I am longing for a shot without saying, "I can't do that" first. And so I did. I learned how to say No to my boss, I learned how to camp in Aspen, I learned how to rock climb and I am a pretty darn good one now. And most importantly, I learned how to let go the "I can't do it" thought.
"hey, Christine, you can do anything you want. Give it a shot and you will get better." That's what I am trying to tell myself.
What's next on my agenda? Be a professional blogger and climb 14ers.
Hi Christine,
Wow. What a great heart you have to challenge you. You've got good things happening. How can you not go far when you put so much passion, heart, and belief in just talking about what you're going to do?
smiles,
Liz
I could probably be a good writer. People have asked me why I don't do it for a living. There's two reasons, fear, and fear. Oh wait, that's one reason. Still, the theirs more than one thing I'm fearful about. The first thing is failure, the other is failure... oh wait.. again.. that's just one thing I guess.. I guess their are actually two things I'm afraid of failing, myself, and myself..
DAMN!
Hi Toadmaster,
I hear the irony and the irony in what you say. The people are right you know. When you put down words without self-consciousness, you write beautifully.
I think it's not yourself you fear.
smiles,
Liz
It's definately harder to argue that you "can" do something, than "can't".
And people tend to take the easy road.
My brain's gonna fall out soon from rattling around. Can anyone help me keep it in?
BOING
Hi Garnet,
You're doing such good thinking. Maybe your brain needs space to be thinking in. . . .
smiles,
Liz
Darn gravity! Makes everything flat! I boing better in space. keep reminding me.
That space boing will come in handy on the space volleyball team.
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